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Last updated: 5 May 2011
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Male Orgasm Denial / Ejaculation Denial
 

   
Back to  Male Orgasm Denial / Ejaculation Denial    |   Chapter 14: BDSM and Devotional Sex

Related techniques and descriptions

There are many techniques and practices that sound similar to male orgasm denial but are in fact different, while others are simply orgasm denial by another name.
 
There is no official body which sets formal definitions for BDSM-related words and phrases. Hence sometimes a word or phrase can have different meanings, and an activity may have several different words or phrases to describe it. Needless to say, this sometimes causes confusion.
 
 
Below is a summary of techniques (in alphabetical order) that relate to male orgasm denial.
 

 
Chastity belt or cage is a device worn to prevent any direct stimulation to the genitals. This device may prevent a man from being able to get an erection. It enables ‘total denial’ (see below).
 

 
Delayed ejaculation is a medical problem in which a man is unable to ejaculate, or takes a very long time to ejaculate. This term is sometimes used to describe the goal for men with premature ejaculation who want to be able to last longer during intercourse. It is also sometimes used to mean slow masturbation, extended session, or ejaculation denial (see below).
 

 
Differed ejaculation is when a man's partner ends a sexual session without letting him ejaculate but both know that there will be another session later that day (or the next morning) in which he will ejaculate.
 

 
Ejaculation delay is most often used to describe the goal for men with premature ejaculation. But, as with delayed ejaculation, the term is used to describe many other activities as well. It has also been used when reporting how long a man lasts from the time of entering the vagina to ejaculation.
 

 
Ejaculation denial is, on this site, when a man agrees to not ejaculate until his partner says he can, and his partner denies him permission to ejaculate most times there is sexual activity.

In Devotional Sex the man can orgasm without ejaculating, so the ejaculation denial used within this lifestyle does not deny the man orgasms.

The term ejaculation denial is sometimes used elsewhere to mean ejaculation delay, extended session, differed ejaculation, slow masturbation and more.

 

 
Erotic sexual denial is when a person is kept in a high state of sexual arousal for an extended length of time without being allowed to orgasm. This may be just a few minutes, in which case this phrase is really talking about slow masturbation. Alternatively the phrase is used to mean ejaculation denial. And it is also sometimes used to mean the total denial of genital stimulation which might be achieved by using a chastity device.
 

 
Extended orgasm is another name for orgasm control (see below). Though the long and slow stimulation will usually lead to a more powerful orgasm (which might last a bit longer than usual), it is really the activity before the orgasm which is extended.
 

 
Extended session is when a man is prevented from ejaculating until his partner decides to end the session. This enables a session to be anything from a few minutes longer than usual to several hours longer.
 

 
Milking is the practice of making a man ejaculate without an orgasm (see non-orgasmic ejaculation below). Milking can be achieved by massaging the prostate (see Wikipedia at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostate_massage).
 

 
Non-orgasmic ejaculation is when a man ejaculates without an orgasm. As the orgasm's rhythmic muscle contractions are missing, the semen just flows out.

As it is the ejaculation which takes away the man's erotic energy, a non-orgasmic ejaculation leaves the man with low erotic energy as if he had had a normal ejaculation. What is missing is the extreme pleasure of the orgasm.

Wikipedia says that the result of this technique "is a full expulsion of semen but without the concomitant relief". It goes on to say: "According to websites on the subject, this technique enables a man to be kept in a state of denial indefinitely."

My personal experience is that though there is not the relief of orgasm, there is the relief of a big fall in erotic energy. A man whose submission is dependent on having high erotic energy will no longer feel submissive after a non-orgasmic ejaculation. A man who feels submissive at any erotic energy level will probably feel even more submissive afterwards because of the powerful act of his Mistress making him cum without an orgasm.

 

 
No-sex arousal is when a man is aroused and erect with his partner but she chooses not to engage in any sexual activity. This defeats the not-uncommon male expectation that his arousal and erection should lead to sexual activity which should then lead to his ejaculation.

In Devotional Sex male arousal is always a good thing, and Devotee couples will often enjoy `just a cuddle´ during which the man is aroused and erect.
 

 
Orgasm denial is when a person is kept in a state of high sexual arousal for an extended length of time without being allowed to orgasm. As with other terms, the problem is in the different interpretations of `extended length of time´.

Orgasm denial is often used to mean not letting a man Climax (ejaculate) for many days. Within Devotional Sex a man who is not allowed to Climax may still enjoy many non-ejaculatory orgasms, so this site uses the term ejaculation denial.

The term orgasm denial is also used to describe the practice of making a man ejaculate without an orgasm (milking). In this case he does ejaculate, but his orgasm is denied.
 

 
Orgasm control is when a person stimulates their partner to a high level of arousal and keeps them at this level for a long time without letting them orgasm until the stimulator wants them to. The `control´ in this term is usually confined to an individual session.

As the male can orgasm without ejaculating in Devotional Sex, orgasm control within Devotional Sex refers to the woman's ability to have her partner Crest or Climax whenever, and only when, she wishes.
 

 
Orgasm without ejaculation is when a man experiences an orgasm without ejaculating. When done using the Taoist multi-orgasmic man technique there is no external or internal emission of semen. As the orgasm does not include ejaculation, the man maintains his erotic energy and thus his erection. He can then, if he chooses, enjoy further non-ejaculatory orgasms, and hence has become multi-orgasmic. In Devotional Sex this type of orgasm is called a Crest.

Another type of orgasm without ejaculation is when the semen is released internally but diverted up the urinary tract instead of out of the penis. A man can tell when this has happened because afterwards his urine will appear milky.
 

 
Ruined orgasm is when a person is brought to orgasm but stimulation is stopped just before orgasm. Without stimulation during the orgasm it is less pleasurable. There are many ways of achieving this.

Wikipedia says: "When performed on a man, this practice allows the release of seminal fluid and physical sexual release, but keeps the man in a state of arousal because the orgasm is never psychologically `actualized´. Because stimulation is not continued through the orgasm, that man is left still in a state of want, which allows continued stimulation after a very brief period, unlike after the actualized or completed orgasm which may require a considerably longer refractory period."

My experience is that an orgasm without ejaculation maintains erotic energy (and erection) whilst a full non-orgasmic ejaculation removes erotic energy (just like after a normal ejaculation). Possibly some ruined orgasms are a halfway point between these two which leaves the man with moderate erotic energy and hence able to recover quickly and continue with sexual activity.
 

 
Slow masturbation is when a person stimulates their partner to a high state of arousal and keeps them at this level for a long time. This might end with a powerful orgasm, or the couple may move on to another activity.

Spending a long time at a high level of arousal can be an exciting experience for a man, and his eventual ejaculation after so much stimulation and anticipation can feel much more powerful and intense than normal.
 

 
Tease and denial is when a person is brought to the point where an orgasm is usually inevitable, at which point stimulation is stopped, leaving the person frustrated that orgasm was not reached.

Because a man who practices Devotional Sex can orgasm without ejaculating, a more pleasurable form of tease and denial can be enjoyed where the man is denied ejaculation but still allowed to orgasm.
 

 
Total denial is when a person is denied any stimulation to their genitals. This is often achieved by wearing a chastity device.
 
 
Many of these terms have been taken from the Wikipedia page on Erotic Sexual Denial (see http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erotic_sexual_denial). For each term I have also done a quick web search to look for other uses.

A few of the above terms (differed ejaculation, extended session, and no-sex arousal) have been made up by me in order to describe activities related to ejaculation denial.
 

 
You can discuss any of the terms used above at the Devotional Sex Forum here.

I welcome any suggestions on how to improve this page.
 
 
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