Sex as relief for a man
This exercise for a man demonstrates how sex and not ejaculating feel when the opposite of Tao and Tantra are applied.
This is a preliminary exercise to the Taste of Tao for a Single Man or the Taste of Tao for a man with a partner exercises.
The Taste of Tao
exercises demonstrate that the eastern approaches of Tao and Tantra
provides some benefits from the man not ejaculating after sexual
This exercise provides a contrasting example as it shows how it feels when the opposite of Tao and Tantra are applied.
doing this exercise one or two days before the Taste of Tao exercise, the two very
different approaches to not ejaculating after sexual activity will be
made very clear.
As with all exercises, what is important is that you follow the spirit of the exercise rather than the detail. So please use the detail I have provided to get a good understanding of the spirit, and then feel free to modify this exercise to whatever will work best for you.
Session One: early one evening
Early one evening sit down, fully clothed, and look at some pornography.
The sitting down fully dressed minimizes any sensuality.
The pornography could be a magazine, video or DVD, or pictures or movie clips off the Internet.
If you have broadband, I recommend http://www.youporn.com/ This
free site (though there is advertising on each page) has a varied
collection of explicit video clips, ranging in length from a few
minutes to over 20 minutes.
Note that I have no connection with this
site, and as per usual, almost all the content is the standard `porn star´ style - explicit but almost never erotic.
The viewing of pornography is an essential component because it will keep your focus away from your body.
If you never, or rarely, look at pornography this component of the exercise is even more essential.
is because if you don't view pornography your normal sexual feelings
are probably more focused on your body than are most men. Thus for you the Taste of Tao exercise will feel closer to normal than it will for most men, and you
will not see the benefits of Tao and Tantra as well.
By viewing the
pornography during this exercise you will experience how it feels to
have your focus away from your body, and this will help show the
benefits of Tao and Tantra when you do the next exercise.
Without touching yourself, see if you can become aroused and erect just from looking at these pictures or movie clips.
Make sure you notice how long it takes to become aroused.
Once you are hard, or after a few minutes if you are not, adjust your trousers so that you can play with yourself.
Still looking at the pornography, start to play with yourself. If you were not fully erect, this should get you there.
a mental note of how aroused you feel. As you have only just started
some sexual activity, even though you are erect, you probably still
feel that your erotic energy is only at a moderate level.
about three minutes of playing with yourself and looking at the pornography, increase your
hand actions to bring yourself as close as you can to ejaculating without doing so. If
you can, keep yourself at this point for about a minute.
Then, before you ejaculate, stop.
Stand up and adjust your clothing so that your erection is put back inside your trousers.
back down, and without touching yourself over your trousers, and while
still viewing the pornography, notice how frustrated you feel.
After perhaps a minute or two more of looking at the pornography, stop looking at this and do something else.
Over the next hour or two notice your background level of erotic energy, and note any feelings of sexual frustration.
Session Two: about two hours later
About two hours after your first session repeat exactly the same procedure.
Notice that at the start of this session you become aroused and erect much quicker than before.
When you play with yourself you probably feel that you want to ejaculate much more strongly than during the first session.
And the frustration of stopping without ejaculating is likely to feel much worse.
Again, during the two hours after this session has finished, notice any feelings of sexual frustration.
not ejaculating at the end of session two is too much of a challenge,
you could skip this session and do session three instead.
main reason for having three sessions instead of two is that the middle
session increases your erotic energy so that when you finally do
ejaculate you are wanting to do this just to relieve your erotic energy.
you are already wanting to ejaculate at the end of session two just to
relieve the energy the exercise will have made it's point, and you can
either decide to end the exercise with only two sessions, or see how it
feels to go even further and experience the three sessions.
Session Three: about two hours after the second session
About two hours after the second session, start the exercise a third time.
Notice that you probably become aroused and fully erect even quicker than you did during the second session.
As before, play with yourself while looking at the pornography. When you first touch yourself notice how much you want to ejaculate.
It is very likely that your erotic energy is now much higher than it was in the first session.
Devotional Sex will sometimes use this energy to significantly enhance the pleasures of sexual activity and to power sexual fun.
at the moment this energy is not being controlled and directed towards
better sex. It is all directed at making you want to end sexual
activity by ejaculating.
only a few minutes of playing with your very hard erection, and while
still looking at the pornography, let yourself finally ejaculate.
Notice how this ejaculation feels. Is it an incredible pleasure? Or is it more relief from your sexual frustration?
After four or so hours of feeling sexually frustrated, how do you feel now?
books would recommend that you sit down and write about how you felt
during this exercise. I will be realistic and I don't expect that most
people will write anything down.
But it is important that you take a few moments to gather your thoughts and think about how you felt.
The whole point of this exercise is to be able to compare and contrast what you have just experienced with the Taste of Tao exercises, so if you don't make any written notes, please make some mental notes.
exercise is designed to keep sex quick, to be as non-sensual as
possible, and to keep your attention focused away from your body.
this exercise you may have enjoyed viewing the pornography, but there
would have been little enjoyment of physical pleasure. Even the physical pleasure of your orgasm would have been minimized because your attention was on the pornography.
would have been difficult to not ejaculate after sessions one and two,
and the erotic energy built up during these sessions would have mainly
been felt as a frustration.
highlight of the exercise would have been your ejaculation. But
this would mainly have been appreciated because it relieved you of your
erotic energy and sexual frustration.
a man thinks of sex as mainly being about relieving himself of erotic
energy this will significantly effect how he has sex with a partner.
with such a man will tend to be quick. He will not be interested in
foreplay, but wanting to quickly get to the main event (which is the
activity which leads to his ejaculation). Intercourse and him receiving
oral sex will usually have him thrusting hard and fast as this is what
is done to make him cum.
This way of experiencing sex is the very opposite of Devotional Sex (and Tao and Tantra).
After experiencing one extreme of sexual behavior the next step is to have a taste of the other end.
If you are a single man, the exercise which gives you a Taste of Tao is here.
If you share your bed with a partner, and she is willing to do an exercise with you, your Taste of Tao is here.
that the comparison with the exercise on this page is most apparent,
you should try and enjoy the Taste of Tao exercise either one or two days after doing this exercise.
Your feedback and comments
Please contact me
if you have some feedback you would like me to publish on this page, or
if you would like to suggest to me an improvement to this exercise.
this exercise is a preliminary to the Taste of Tao exercises, voting
for this exercise is located at the end of the Taste of Tao exercises.