Her Managing His Ejaculations

With a Beginner Spell you are both agreeing to practice Devotional Sex for a specified length of time and the Spell ends when she has him ejaculate at this time.

As well as giving him certainty for what he is 'signing up for', the Beginner Spells means that you both know that every session during the Spell (other than the final session) will end without him ejaculating.

S0, for example, if a couple agree to have a Devotional Weekend, then both know that he doesn't Climax until Sunday evening (she decides how and exactly when on Sunday night).

Once this feels like your Devotional Sex normal, and ending a Session without him ejaculating doesn't have him feeling denied by her or her feeling that she is denying him, it becomes easy to move up to doing the Experienced Spells. With these Spells he gives her control over when (ie which day) he will Climax.

This section looks at how she manages his Climaxes when he has given her this control.

 
Devotional Sex isn't about her denying him ejaculations - it is him committing to far fewer ejaculations because he wants to be her Knight.

My recommendation for an experienced forty year old Knight is that he, on average, lasts seven days.




Remember that individual differences apply and a Knight might prefer his average be lower or higher than what I recommend.

His preferred average should be the base (ie starting point) for managing how often he Climaxes.

 
If his preferred average is once every seven days there there are likely to be times when he will feel that he would like to go a little longer and times when he would like to Climax a bit earlier than usual.

If she can't tell how he is feeling she can just ask, eg "Would you like release tonight?"

As one of the four commitments for a Knight in the Definition of Devotional Sex is that he openly and honestly communicates with his Princess, there is nothing wrong with him telling her how he feels and saying when he would like to Climax.

There is nothing wrong with her allowing him release most times he requests it.


The rest of this page and the following page explains why she may wish to vary from his preference.

 
Though a Knight usually has fairly good control of his energy there can be times, even for an experienced Knight, when he feels he really wants release. Not only can this happen when he is lasting longer than his average, it can happen before he reaches his average.

Even if she usually allows him release when he asks for it, it can work well for her to sometimes not allow him release when he really wants it. This isn't about her denying him, rather it is her challenging him.

For him not to feel denied he will need a Devotional Cuddle until his energy eventually falls to a more normal level.


Having him meet this challenge is very good for a Princess as it confirms that he really has given her control. She can feel his very high energy as she holds his erection, and so she can feel that this really is challenging for him. That he is willing to meet this challenge for her means that she can feel confident that her control is just as real during all the other times she wants to have something happen or to end an activity.

Another benefit is that if he has a fantasy that he would love to do but she doesn't want to this to happen, her feeling this much in control allows her to feel relaxed about his fantasy because him accepting that he won't ejaculate when he really wants to proves that he really will do as she wishes.


He has to work hard to control his energy and direct it to intimacy and connection. So for him this is both a time of feeling powerful intimacy and connection and feeling that her control is very real.

Having her control feel so powerfully real also helps him be a better Knight because it then feels more natural and less challenging to fulfill all her other, easier, wishes.


Note that if he really wants release one night and he doesn't get it, the next day his energy is likely to return to a more normal level, and he may even prefer not to Climax the next night.

Him meeting this challenge is not only good for strengthening the Devotional Dynamic, but is good exercise for him learning to control his own erotic energy.

 
There may be times when he has a physical problem (illness, aching balls, etc) or an emotional problem (eg work stress) and he knows that releasing his energy will help him cope with rest-of-life issues.

Devotional Sex is fully consensual, and part of that is that if he says he NEEDS something then it should happen.

Him 'really wanting' release is him in Knight mode. Saying he Needs something is stepping above being her Knight to taking care of his overall well-being.

 
The main reason that Devotional Sex gives the Princess control over when he Climaxes is so that she can set his energy as she wishes.


 
If his desired average is seven days, and on Saturday morning it is day five, he is probably hoping for a sexy weekend which will use his building energy. But if this Saturday morning she feels that she really wants a rest from his energy and she doesn't want a sexy weekend, then she can have him Climax on Saturday morning.

Though he misses out on the sexy weekend he had hoped for, he also avoids having high energy but being disappointed that not much is done with this.

And not only does she avoid having him charged up when she doesn't want this, having him Climax when he would prefer not to proves to both that her control is very real.


 
Alternatively, if his average is seven days, and on Friday night he has gone eight days, and if she feels it would be fun to have him very energized all weekend, she can keep him going until Sunday night and so this Season will lasts for ten days.

Though it may be challenging for him to last this long, because she is enjoying his energy and she will have some activities happen which celebrate his energy, he is, overall, very likely to enjoy this charged up weekend.


 
When Devotional Sex is going to continue after he Climaxes she should remember that one side effect of him lasting much longer than usual is that his recovery time after an ejaculation may be a  longer than normal.

For example, if she has him Climax on Sunday morning, he may still not have regained much energy by Sunday evening.

So if she thinks she might want an eager Knight that evening, it works best to not have him Climax in the morning.

If she has him Climax in the evening then he has the whole night to recover. But when he wakes up he probably won't have his usual energy.

If she wants to have a bit of a rest from his energy at the start of the Season then if nothing (other than a cuddle) happens in the morning his energy won't be fired up.

But if she wants his energy to start to build then some Desire Play, or any other activity, will get him hard and he will get out of bed energized and once again feeling like her Knight.



The next page looks at:

• including lots of variation
  
  
• having a different average than his preference
         (inc. having him last for longer than he prefers), and
  
  
• not letting him know her plans
        (but there are some fun exceptions)