Chapter 40 - Will

I get into bed and wait for my wife to join me once she has finished tidying up downstairs.

Tonight I'm feeling very charged up - I feel a need for sexual activity. I'm also on edge because I know that there is no guarantee that anything will happen.

Tonight she didn't seem too tired, but I have learned over the years, and especially over the last six years, whether or not I think my princess is too tired is no indication of what will or won't happen.

Sarah comes into the bedroom and begins to undress.

My desire is already hard waiting for her and watching her undress helps to reinforce that hardness.

Her undressing doesn't go all the way and she gets into bed still wearing her panties. My mind shifts gear into expecting no more than a cuddle. Though my expectation has changed my energy remains.

We face each other and cuddle and nothing more happens other than a quick kiss.

After ten minutes she turns over. ‘Time for sleep.’

I move to cuddle into her back.

‘Goodnight princess,’ I reply.

Before Devotional Sex her not wanting sex when I was very eager had left me feeling frustrated and unloved. But as we now have much more sexual activity than before this more than compensates for missing out tonight. Despite still being hard I don't feel frustrated. And with the lovely cuddle I feel very loved.

I fall asleep happy and content.
 
 
I wake up shortly before our alarm is due to go off.

She is still asleep but I shift a little and cuddle into her. My desire is enjoying its usual morning erection.

I enjoy our morning cuddles. They are a sign of our love for one another. It's wonderful starting every day enjoying this intimacy and connection.

I still have the high energy from last night, but given the time and it being a work day I feel sure that this morning is going to be just a cuddle.

The alarm goes off. I reach out and turn it off, then return to our cuddle.

Sarah moves her hand to take hold of my desire. With my high energy this feels wonderful and I moan with appreciation.

It's great that more than I expected is happening, but I stiill don't expect things to go any further. But I hope I'm wrong - I again really want more. But then I realize that we don't have much time before we have to get out of bed, and so once again my hopes are dashed.

She holds my erection, her hand barely moving.

I could easily thrust my hips and use her hand to help me cum, but I won’t do that. I don’t do this because I made the commitment six years ago to only ever cum when she wishes.

Then her hand starts to move more. It glides over my desire and balls.

Though I only expected a cuddle I'm now getting some wonderful desire play!

How long this will continue? Will this be all? Maybe she will tell me to release! It has only been four days since my last release so this is unlikely, but I never know. Occasionally she surprises me by having me release much earlier than usual.

‘Unwrap,’ she says.

This is the first word we have spoken this morning, and what a wonderful word this is - she is asking me to remove her panties!

Now I am more confident that something significant is happening. My brain shifts into another gear.

‘Would you like some joy?’she asks.

‘Yes please! I would love that', I reply.

'Joy' she says with a smile.

As she doesn’t move I roll over into the missionary position. I guide my erection to her pleasure. I slowly, tenderly, push forward into her. The desire play has given her time to become aroused allowing me to slide in with ease.

Once I am fully inside her I pause. I rejoice in this union of bodies, minds and spirits. How different to the times before Devotional Sex and even from when we first started Devotional Sex.
 
 
I recall one of the first times we had joy when I was an inexperienced knight ...

I was very aroused, as I am now. When Sarah suggested we have joy I had thrust into her and had started pumping away.

Sarah had stopped me in my tracks by saying ‘You’re not going to cum unless I tell you, are you?’

‘Um ... no,’ I had reassured her, though I wasn’t entirely convinced myself.

I realized I had to slow my movements right down and refocus. I was still getting used to the idea that intercourse was not about my rushing to ejaculation. No longer was it about thrusting as fast as I could so that I had a climax as soon as possible, with Sarah as a passenger as it were.

Her words worked then and have been in the back of my mind ever since. Now, whenever we have joy it needs to be about both of us and it needs to be about intimacy and connection rather than about self-gratification. In fact all that we do sensually and sexually now to fits that description.
 
 
I refocus to the pleasures of this moment ...

I think about the love I have for my wife, her beauty, her body, her mind, the way we are physically joined at this moment in time.

I slide in and out slowly, savoring each moment of the touch.

We kiss. We look into each other’s eyes. I feel her pleasure surrounding my desire.

For several minutes we both enjoy intercourse, delighting in such tender love making. Then her hands find my behind and press down on me.

I understand that she wants me to stop moving. We lay there, our bodies locked together, stationery.

Does she have further plans for this morning? I look into her eyes and ask but they don’t give me any answer other than happiness.

We lie together for a couple of minutes before she gives a playful smack.

‘You need to get up now to have your shower or you will be late for work,’ she says.

‘How about I phone the boss and tell him I will be late today as I am making love to my princess? I’m sure he’ll understand.’ I smile.

‘Get up and get ready or you’ll get fired by your understanding boss,’ I am told firmly.

I slowly withdraw my desire. I want to enjoy the final contact. It is still fairly erect but I have lost some hardness.

I give her a kiss and still with a half-hard erection walk away from the bed. I know that she is watching me.

As I get to the door I look back to the bed and see Sarah in exactly the same position as when we were having joy a minute ago. That view will stay with me throughout the day!

I would love to remain here with her, enjoying the view, sharing our bodies, but I know I can’t and so I go and get into the shower.