Devotional Sex

Real-Life Devotional Sex

All about one real-life couple

This page is a detailed view
of how one couple are enjoying Devotional Sex.

This couple filled in five of my surveys in one burst, and this has enabled me to present a very comprehensive view of their Devotional Sex life.

Compared with others who Live Devotional Sex they engage in a bit more sexual activity, she is a bit more dominant, he is a bit more Tantric, and they are more adventurous with others. So this isn't 'typical' Devotional Sex.

But just as there are many real-life Devotee couples who are less active than most and would never dream of doing anything with others, there are also many couples who are as active as this couple and who also have had some fun with others.

So even though this isn't typical, it is very real Devotional Sex.  Enjoy :)

They are both in their late 30's, she a little younger than him, and they live in the United Kingdom.

They filled in the surveys together and both added a few comments.


Before they did Devotional Sex
Before they started Devotional Sex their sex life was fairly typical for a couple in their late 20's.

They had sex about 4 times a week, this always included intercourse, the style of sex was moderately active, and their longest session in a normal week, from start of foreplay to end of activities, lasted between 10 to 20 minutes.

When they had sex they spent most of their time having intercourse, with their next most common activity being him using his hands on her sex, followed by her giving him oral sex, then her playing with his erection, and the least amount of time was spent with him giving her oral sex.

When they went to bed or woke up together and this wasn't when they had sex they usually didn't touch - ie no cuddles.

Each week he ejaculated about 6 times - 4 times with his partner and 2 times masturbating alone.


Their Devotional Sex life

The have been Living Devotional Sex (ie he is always her Knight) for nearly ten years.

It was HER idea to explore Devotional Sex and initially he was a bit reluctant.

Their overall feeling about practicing Devotional Sex is that they are both extremely happy.

Both said that their biggest benefit arising from Devotional Sex is that it gives 'us both a much better sex life'.

They added that:

Devotional Sex is a wonderful lifestyle if you embrace it.  It has bought us so close and given us both intense pleasure.

We wish more couples practiced it and we had found it when first married.

We are both closer than ever before

As her Knight he only ever ejaculates when she decides, and in nearly ten years of Devotional Sex he has never deliberately ejaculated without her permission. They both feel that this has formed a very powerful bond between them which is now an important part of their relationship.

Not surprisingly, given the above, they expect to continue living this way.

Her style of control is mild dominance, ie
firmly in control but it's not strong domination.

Only about 20% of what happens arises from his suggestions.

(Of course if they are in bed together and he has an erection he doesn't need to say anything for her to know that he desires sexual activity.)

His pubic hair is shaved as the couple's private symbol that he is her Knight. She is partially shaved (which has no meaning within Devotional Sex.)


In bed at night and waking up
Each week there are seven times a couple go to bed at night and seven times they wake up.

This couple's typical week consists of:
This couple are a bit more sexually active than most Devotee couples, but it is fairly common for a Devotee couple to have some intimacy every wakeup and bedtime (even if this is just a cuddle).

See the Results of 'What Happens in Bed' Survey to see the median, and click the following to see the huge variation.

Note that for five of the wake ups and bedtimes each week she decides that she doesn't want to receive any sexual pleasures. And when she doesn't want to receive pleasures she sometimes decides to give him some Desire Play, sometimes it's just a Devotional Cuddle, and just once a week it is only a cuddle.

As a couple often have Devotional Cuddle before activity, and a Devotional Cuddle is usually enjoyed after activity ends, this couple are probably having a Devotional Cuddle 13 out of the 14 wake ups and bedtimes each week!

How sex is enjoyed
Like most couples the number of sessions per week with Devotional Sex is much higher than it was before. For this couple before was 4 and now it is 11. This is a slightly bigger increase than most.

And like most other Devotee couples the length of their longest session in a week has got lot's longer - in this case from 10 to 20 minutes before to now being between 1 and 2 hours!

With Devotional Sex the sexual activity they spend the most time doing is Pleasure Kissing (see below).

Their next most common activity is Pleasure Play, but this happens a lot less than Pleasure Kissing. Their third most time is spent with her giving him some Desire Play, then her giving him a Desire Kiss, and finally Joy.

Most couples keep having Joy as often as before, but this couple now only have Joy half as often as before. So instead of Joy taking place 100% of the time it now only happens about 20% of the time.

(Given that they have Joy about twice a week but spend the least amount of time doing this I suspect that most of the time their Joy only lasts a short time.)

They have gone a bit further towards Tantra than most Devotee couples as their style of sex is now very slow and sensual.


Pleasure Kisses
As with most Devotees, the sexual activity that they spend the most time doing is him giving her a Pleasure Kiss and they enjoy this about every day.

Just a few Pleasure Kisses are done mainly to please her Knight (which works well because he thinks the amount of Pleasure Kissing is about right).

When she receives a Pleasure Kiss she likes to take her time, so she never has him kiss her for just a few minutes but has it last for at least 15 minutes and often for 30 minutes or longer.

So this couple are spending several hours each week enjoying Pleasure Kissing!

Pleasure Kissing now being a major focus of their Devotional Sex life is a very big change from before they started Devotional Sex as back then this was the sexual activity which they spent the  least time doing.

She writes:

I have a fare more intense orgasms when squatting on my husbands face receiving oral. He never fails to make me orgasm at least once and often two or three times in a session.

To have him give her a Pleasure Kiss she says "Ritual".

"Ritual" was my recommended term in Version 1 of this website.

As I got lots of feedback that many didn't like this term, and my Oral Sex Survey found that only 23% of couples used "Ritual",  I've now changed my recommendation to her saying "Pleasure".

Of course couples who enjoy the old term are welcome to keep using it.

She writes:

We are very close after he has made me orgasm through oral sex.

It is a wonderful feeling holding his erection afterwards (I rarely allow him to ejaculate). He is very devout and intensely loving.

The Devotional Cuddle afterwards is very important for a Knight as it enables him to direct his high erotic energy to Exaltation - feeling intense intimacy and connection - and thus avoid feeling frustrated.

It's lovely to read about a Princess enjoying and appreciating her Knight's devotion after the sex has ended.

HER experience
As his Princess she enjoys an orgasm about everyday which is much more often than before they did Devotional Sex.

She is multi-orgasmic
(ie can she have multiple consecutive orgasms). After an orgasm activity usually continues for a while even though an orgasm most often has her feel tired. She never fakes an orgasm, and she sometimes brings herself to orgasm when she is alone.

Him giving her a Pleasure Kiss and at the same time using his fingers is her most common way of reaching orgasm, and she reaches orgasm most of the times he licks her.

Her second most common way of having an orgasm is from having Joy with her on top.

After she has enjoyed one orgasm from a Pleasure Kiss she sometimes lets him give her a further orgasm with his fingers.

HIS experience
He now ejaculates less than once a month.

He writes:

I find I need to ejaculate much less having practiced Devotional Sex for nearly ten years. Ejaculation is now very rare for me - maybe not even once a month, and then only when my Princess decides and tells me to. So not often these days and not needed.

I have spoken to my Princess about this and I now go much longer before she instructs me to release. The longer I go without ejaculating, strangely, the less I feel the need to let go and I actually want to hold on and not have the ejaculation as I enjoy our intense intimacy from prolonged Seasons.

We have talked about me becoming chaste and not ejaculating at all ever again and I think it is something we will move to over time.

This brings us even closer together.

My recommendationfor a 40 year old experienced Knight is to last on average about 7 days with a maximum rare peak of 14 days. So lasting over a month is very different from what I recommend. But lasting over a month is what is recommended for men who are serious about practicing Tantric Sex.

But though his big picture is that the wants to last longer, when it comes to his feelings near the end of a Season he says that his preference is to ejaculate a little more often than happens. And she says that if she didn't have to take into account his feelings she would have him ejaculate much less often.

Devotional Sex is powered by his body wanting to ejaculate and him having enough erotic energy to always be quick to arouse and have him desiring lots of activity. So him feeling that he wants release and him always desiring sex is good Devotional Sex.

He also writes:

I occasionally have a Tantric orgasm and that is a wonderful experience for us to share and my Princess counts that as release even though there is no ejaculation.

One of my survey questions asks how the respondent relates Devotional Sex to other techniques. Most think that Devotional Sex is a mild version of FemDom, I think it is a different technique from all others, and this Knight (as well as just a few other respondents) think that it is a mild form of eastern practices (Tao/Tantra).

So clearly this couple have taken a big step towards Tantra.

When first exploring Devotional Sex they did have times when he accidentally ejaculated when with his Princess and neither or them wanted this to happen.

But now having learned great control such accidents happen rarely or never.

He really loves giving her Pleasure Kisses and he thinks that the amount they do each week is about right. When giving her a Pleasure Kiss he is always hard.

Compared to before Devotional Sex he now enjoys giving her an orgasm much more than before.

Facials are a cliche of porn, and he would love to sometimes do this. But as his Princess she has decided that this will never happen.

When sexual activity ends and he has not got to ejaculate that session they almost always have a Devotional Cuddle and he most often feels intense intimacy and connection which slowly becomes relaxed intimacy.

As they have lots of sessions each week and he rarely ejaculates he very often enjoys Exaltation - a pleasure I believe is unique to Devotional Sex.

As they engage in lots of activity he spends about
9 to 10 hours every week fully erect while with his Princess. (This is about double the median for other Devotees who have filled in my Style Survey.) But this isn't just in bed, as the activity which he spends most time doing when erect with his Princess is Affirmation (see below).

The second most time spent erect with his Princess is with Devotional Cuddles (remember that lots of their sexual activity in bed begins and ends with a Devotional Cuddle).

He gets aroused very easily and about three times a week he gets erect from just a phone call or messaging with his Princess.

When he is alone he plays with himself for a short time (without ending in ejaculation) about once a day and with arousal time before and after this he ends up being erect while alone between 3 to 4 hours each week.

When his Princess decides to give him release this is most often done during Joy.

Their second most common way of giving him releases is from some anal play.

Compared to before Devotional Sex, he now enjoys having an ejaculation much more when it does happen, and the few times she does have him release she enjoys doing this a bit more than before.

Desire Kisses
Desire Kisses are only a minor part of their activities and happen a lot less than they did before they started Devotional Sex.

He only receives a Desire Kiss a few times a year and these only last about 5 minutes. She sometimes allows him to Climax from a Desire Kiss.

She writes:

I just don't enjoy giving him oral sex as much as receiving. It's not what I see being his Princess and Devotional Sex as being about.

It's used as a real reward for him being so attentive and good, sometimes used as a treat on his birthday or at Christmas.

I don't enjoy it much myself so it's done for the benefit of my Knight although very rarely.

(About 10% of Knights who Live Devotional Sex receive a Desire Kiss 4 times a week or more, so when a Princess enjoys doing this it does happen much more often.)

He would like her to give him a Desire Kiss much more often.

But though he misses out on this pleasure remember that overall he is extremely happy as her Knight.

They enjoy Affirmation about 6 times each week and she enjoys this much more than he does.

Being Affirmed has him feel hers, but he also feels proud to be her Knight.

When he first gets erect during Affirmation this is most likely just from the excitement of the situation. Once he is erect the reason he is most likely to stay that way is that his Princess decides to gently play with him.

What happens during their Affirmation is
a mix of him being kept hard for a long time and him not being hard for long periods.

As well as lots of Affirmation at home, they often enjoy it away from home (eg on a clothing optional or deserted beach, out in nature, etc).

She writes:

I have taken him on naturalist holidays and seeing him erect in public is such a turn on!

The Devotional Sex afterwards is great!

I don't allow him to ejaculate while away from home so long holidays, or short holidays which start without him having had release for weeks, really are the best.

  Activities with others
They have told some friends about their Living Devotional Sex.

They must have done a great job of explaining the joys of living this way as
some of those told then explored Devotional Sex for themselves and a couple of them are still practicing it!

Telling others about your practice of Devotional Sex can be as far as things go - just talk. But for the more adventurous things can go further - including having him Affirmed in front of others.

This couple often enjoy having him Affirmed in front of others,
most often done in a larger mixed group, and this includes him being aroused for all to see.

The others all know that this is done as part of their practice of Devotional Sex
(ie they knew that he obeys her sexual wishes and that she decides when he can ejaculate, etc).

She writes:

Having my Knight affirm his devotion in front of others is so lovely and makes me so proud.

My Knight still gets a little embarrassed when in company as he often gets very aroused, but our friends know and understand our lifestyle and a couple of them also practice it.

It's really
great when we all get together outside in the yard during the summer and we get to compare our Affirmed Knights. I always like to see him pumped up when this happens. It really brings out my exhibitionist streak, even if it is just to "show" him off.

Making sure he hasn't ejaculated for a very long time is essential for these events to help have maximum impact.  Seeing my Knight rise to the occasion is brilliant - he is publically showing his devotion!

Although it still makes him embarrassed, especially when with done with a new mixed group of friends, he is getting much less inhibited as time goes on.

We know that overall he feels proud to be her Knight, that overall he is extremely happy doing Devotional Sex, and it is clear that there is no humiliation involved with this activity.  So even though he finds being Affirmed in front of others a bit challenging I assume that this is not only something which he is willing to do but something he also enjoys.

As I said at the top of this page, this couple isn't a typical Devotee couple as they engage in more sexual activity than most, she is a bit more dominant, he is a more Tantric, and they are more adventurous when with others.

But they are not unusual as there are lots of other Devotee couples who are similarly active.

For me perhaps the biggest surprise is that they are this active even though they have been enjoying Devotional Sex for almost ten years.

Given their success with Devotional Sex in their private life, and that they have told friends about this who have also gone on to enjoy the lifestyle, it isn't surprising that when I asked what proportion of couples, if told
about all the pleasures and the challenges of Devotional Sex, would give it a try, they said 70%.

I think this figure is far too high to be realistic. But their optimism shows that there is the potential for Devotional Sex, one day, to be enjoyed by millions. What fun!

You can discuss or ask questions about this page here at my forum.


Adding to this section

The couple described above are welcome to Contact Me if they wish to correct or add anything to this page.

Reading about what others do in real-life is not only fun but will hopefully inspire some readers to try Devotional Sex for themselves and inspire those already doing Devotional Sex to try some new things.

So if you do Devotional Sex please consider sharing what you do. For example you can post a Devotional Sex Diary into my forum.


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Page last updated: 15 July 17                                                                               Copyright © MichaelK 2017